I'm not a huge chick flick fan, but "You've Got Mail" is one of the very few that I absolutely love and watch over and over. I had the pleasure of watching it again last weekend and caught the best quote I'd previously missed. It describes me perfectly. Here it is, for your reading pleasure:

"The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don't know what the heck* they're doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino."



*Edited to meet Olivia Walton's standard of language

The Dog Days

I once again am dog/housesitting.  This week's charge is a morbidly obese (emphasis on morbidly-I'm terrified she's going to die while I'm here) beagle.  This dog barely tolerates me, but we have come to an understanding.  I will let her do pretty much whatever without bothering her if she promises not to bark/growl at me.  She gets rather irritated at the late hours I keep, and when I went to get in bed tonight, I found that she'd beat me to it.  I have no idea how she covered herself up without opposable thumbs.

Note that she's sleeping with her head propped up and eyes open.  Also, let it be known that she snores louder than any man or beast I have ever heard.

Psychobabble

Sometimes I think in my field we use a little too much psychobabble that makes us soft and really kind of dumb.  Now granted, I understand that my kids have special needs and therefore can't always be treated like typically developing students, but there comes a time where things just get ridiculous.   

After one student kicked me (not hard), this ensued:

Darcie:  "Student, you are not showing me that you can be safe so I will have to call Behavior Specialist."

Student (in a low and snarling voice):  "Shut up, %*^&$."

A few minutes later, the Behavior Specialist arrives.

B.S.:  "Student, what is wrong?"

Student kicks wall.

B.S. : "Student, you need to be safe. Can you use your words and tell me what's wrong?"

Student (in same snarling voice):  "Shut up you %&^*$"

B.S. : "Thank you for using your words and telling me that you're upset."

Thank you? Seriously?  I realize that the student's behavior was escalated and she was nearing crises mode, but thank you?  

What's going to happen in the future?  Thank you for telling me your upset, but I'm sorry you hit that man with your car?

Any thoughts on this?

Diva Darkside

A recent conversation:

Me:  "Loud Student, I'm going to get really cranky if you don't lower your voice."

Loud Student:  "Don't get cranky, Darcie.  Being cranky just takes you to the dark side, and we can't let them win!"

Why I Teach Social Skills

By now you all should know how I adore teaching social skills.  It's such an entertaining topic to brighten up my Mondays.  Today my older boys discussed appropriate and inappropriate responses to different conversations and statements.    They were awesome today, really getting into the discussion and keeping me on my toes by asking me tough questions like, "Is lying ever ok?"  and "What if a girl asks if she looks fat and she really does?"  

For part of the activity I had them role play different situations.  One situation, that was a favorite, was about how you would confront a bully who was picking on your little brother.  My boy with the ever active imagination (the inappropriate ghost joke boy with the Cuban neighbors) came up with my favorite (albeit inappropriate) answer.

"For (insert the Lord's name taken vainly here) sake man!  Can't you see the kid has multiple sclerosis?  Leave him alone or I'll have to shoot you!"

And this, my friends, is why I teach social skills.

Oh Deer!

Warning:  If you're looking for a post with a point, this is the wrong place.  If not, read on.

I've mentioned the wildlife around my apartment a couple of times now, and I'm developing a, probably unhealthy, obsession with the deer.  For the mile or two I drive down my road to get home, my eyes are constantly darting back and forth looking for these deer.  They are everywhere in massive herds.

Friday evening I arrived home, kind of late, and pulled into my parking spot to find five deer no more than 15 or 20 feet in front of my car.  I got pretty nervous, thinking of all of the videos I've seen on TV where deer go crazy and jump on people to hoof them to death.  I tried everything I could think of to startle them and get them to run away so I could safely leave my car.  I honked.  I flashed my lights.  I took pictures with my flash on my camera.  I slammed my car door.  They just looked at me, daring me to get out.  

After about ten minutes, I decided I was ridiculous and got out of my car.  As you can see, I wasn't hoofed to death, but I'm not so sure it won't happen in the future.  A couple of them stood up, and they all just stared, most audaciously, making me feel like I was in Narnia or something, letting me know that I'm on their turf.

For all of you who don't believe me, I extend an invitation to you to come and see for yourself.

It's Official...

Dear Elisabeth Elliot and "Keep a Quiet Heart" have done it again.   

They have made me think. 

A lot.  

Here's the latest quote I've been mulling over and over:

"Let's never forget that some of His greatest mercies are His refusals."

You can read the full article here.

What's "hit' you lately?

I <3 Snow Days!

(That's supposed to look like a heart up there)

The snow gods knew that my kids were funny enough yesterday to give me today off of school. Here are some of their antics:

Student:  "Can you help me, Barbie?

Me:  "Barbie?"

Student:  "I mean Darcie.  You look like my doll."

Me:  "We must be playing with different Barbies."

Student:  "You wanna hear a joke?"

Me:  "Sure." (forgetting to ask if it was appropropriate)

Student:  "What makes girl ghosts sensitive?"

Me:  "I don't know.  What?"

Student:  "Their b-o-o-obs."

While working on a work sheet about junk food, out of the middle of nowhere I hear:

"Does anyone here speak Portuguese?"  

Can anyone here tell me where that came from?

A Lack of Color

After commenting on a Facebook photo about my dark coat, dear Jody got me thinking about the lack of color in my wardrobe.  Then it really hit me today as I was getting into my black car wearing a black skirt, shirt and cardigan that I have nothing bright in my life.  The only colors I had on were the white polka dots on my shirt and my nude colored pantyhose, if you can even consider white and nude colors.  After self-psychoanalysis, I determined that some of my autistic tendencies make me dread color.  Red gives me headaches, yellow hurts my eyes, orange hurts my stomach, etc.

Does anyone else have issues with color or am I just nuts?

Oops...

So, I tried posting pictures the "easy" way, and it turns out the easy way didn't work.  Oops.  The pictures I referenced in the last two posts are now up for your viewing pleasure.  Enjoy!

Beggars Can't Be Choosers....

The perk of starting out on your own for the first time is free furniture from folks who want to help you out. I am a gracious receiver of such gifts, and let's just say that my bedroom furniture is, well, eclectic.  Ok, it doesn't match at all.

Having a small room and lots of things to put in it, I wanted a twin sized bed.  I'm so thankful that the one my brother used when he was very young was available.  

When my brother was young, he went through a sticker phase.  We have stickers all over our house from the sticker phase of '92; the refrigerator, the front door, and my new-to-me bed.  At least the one on my bed is intimidating.

The Girl. The Boots. The Legend.

Yesterday I received an excited email from my mother letting me know that Doc Martens have named a boot after me.

Ok, so that's a lie, but isn't it funny that there is a Diva Darcie boot?  I knew I should have copyrighted my name!

DR MARTENS DIVA DARCIE BOOT. The Darcie is an eye catching boot that makes up part of the Dr Martens Diva Collection. Shiny patent upper in the traditional 8 tie lace up style but with a chunky wooden heel unit with a height of 8cm to finish.

DivaDarcie and the Series of Unfortunate Events

I feel like Lemony Snicket.  My morning was filled with a series of unfortunate events.

Tuesday night, my sleep was filled with awful dreams.

Therefore I woke up Wednesday exhausted and forty-five minutes late.

I then was running late to work and didn't have time to fix a cup of coffee.

So, I decided to go to Starbucks as a treat for the awful night (and really that was just an excuse- making coffee would have been faster).

On my way out of my parking lot,  a large turkey swooped in front of my car (did I mention that I live in the Little Apartment In the Big Wood?).

He was joining his enormous turkey friend in an activity that involved pecking a bright yellow truck with his pointy beak.

This led to me to texting my roommate to tell her my morning excitement while leaving Starbucks.

Texting then led me to not pay attention to the road, which led to me driving over an island in the middle of the road.

This led to an awful, awful loud noise and a brand new tire with a bubble in it.

This event made me ask for "manly advice" from a fatherly man at work, who told me the chances were great that my tire would explode.

He led me to "Ok Tires" which told me I needed a new front left tire and an alignment.

The folks at OK led me to swiping my card to the tune of $200.

This led to a headache and a neurotic blog post.

I thought I would post a Thanksgiving thankful list a little late.  My life is so blessed, and too often I complain rather than thanking the Lord for all He's given me.  Here are a few things:

1. My new place.  It's so cozy but still provides enough space to have people over.  
2. My roomie.  She is wonderful!  And I love having speakerphone conversations with our mutual dear friend, Laura (who is responsible for bringing us together).
3. Plenty of food to experiment with (with cooking, that is).  Friends beware, this wannabe Martha is out of control!
4. Time with my family.  I got my first "grown-up" sibling experience over break.  I love how our relationships have evolved into much less fighting and arguing and much more grown up conversation.
5. My dear friends.  So many of them are scattered about, but the marvels of technology still make them feel close.
6. Lest I get too sappy, I am thankful that my face is still intact after being hit not just once, but twice last week.  A fist in the nose is much less funny than a plastic piece of fruit (I'll be honest-I'm mainly writing this so you'll feel sorry for me)

Did anyone receive any unexpected blessings over the Thanksgiving holiday?