My Top Thing I Want To Tell You On This Last Day of 2007

1)  Happy New Year!!!

(how hokey was that?)

My Top 2 Movies Seen in a Theater of 2007

This isn't too difficult because although there were probably more, I only remember seeing three.  The movie that isn't making the cut is "Ratatouille," which I'm sure was a fine film, but I wouldn't know since I fell asleep halfway through it.

2)  "Dan In Real Life"-First, let me just say that I love Steve Carell.  Secondly, I loved this movie because a lot of it felt like an independent film.  It wasn't too chick flickish and didn't make me leave all starry eyed and searching for the perfect love like most chick flicks induce.

1)  "Juno"-I just saw this movie Thursday and just thought it was wonderful.  Ellen Page delivers sarcasm so well, but not to the point of being obnoxious. This was an artsy movie, and all of the acting was great.  It was just a sweet, but really, really funny story.

My Top 3 Wedding Likes of 2007

Today one of my dearest friends got married, so I'm going to try to manipulate today's "Top" list to share in some good times.  It's difficult to narrow it down to three, so I'll probably just list things I have pictures for. That should be easy since I managed to take only four pictures over the three days of festivities (thank heaven for Facebook and camera toting bridesmaids).

3)  The ultimate girl time as you bond with your fellow bridesmaids

 

(we were sneaking food out of the reception hall before the wedding and got caught)

2)  Getting to be there while your friend marries a great guy

1)  And I'm not going to lie, I love the perks-getting my hair and nails done and the jewelry.  Aren't my new pearls quite nice?

(I'm going for the '50s housewife look in this picture)

My Top 4 Faults of 2007 (aka Things I Want to Work on in 2008)

4)  Being selfish-in 2008 I want to consider others more than I consider myself (and this includes talking about myself and my issues much, much less)

3)  Reveling in the glory days of college-College was a great time in my life, and I have had a tendency to live in the past instead of the moment.  I want to make my life great now and make new friends in this area.

2)  My faith-I have placed this on the back burner this year as I have tried to live life on my own. I've really used God as my emergency hotline, and in 2008 I want to try to bring Him back to the forefront of my thinking and life.

1)  I don't know what you'd call my spirit now, but I know I would like to work on having a more gentle spirit.  I'd like to be less crass, less gossipy, less of a talker and more kind, thoughtful, and compassionate, kind of like an Olivia Walton or Marmee from "Little Women."

What are your hurdles to overcome in 2008?

My Top 5 Pieces of Wedding Advice of 2007

In honor of my dear friend Laura's upcoming nuptials, and because bridesmaiding is practically a hobby of mine, today's list focuses on how to successfully be in a wedding.  I'm going to be really honest, I don't think any of this took place in 2007, but I am running out of list ideas, so here it goes:

5)  Don't go to that creepy place at the side of the road to buy a gift. Just don't.

4)  Be be sure to write your groomsman's name down, unless you actually do want to call him the wrong name all weekend.

3)  As a guest book attendant, take your job very seriously.  Remember, you're kind of like the bouncer who is the first line of defense against unruly (aka drunk) guests.

2)  Do not show off your vertical jump when going for the bride's bouquet, especially if being videotaped.  You might just look absolutely ridiculous and have a bride friend who will find joy in repeatedly showing the video to everyone she knows-in slow motion.

1)  Do not go to a carnival at a Catholic church with the wedding party right after the rehearsal dinner (when your stomach is full of barbecue),  and definitely do not ride a ride called Pharaoh's Fury that has over-the-shoulder seat belts.  Not that I know from experience, but this could result in puking in a bush in front of a priest and large, seat belt induced marks on your shoulders, that when wearing a strapless dress, resemble hickeys.  

My Top 6 Experiences of 2007

Ok, first let me say that I can't believe I ever said I would make all of these crazy lists.  I doubt many are reading them (I know I wouldn't if I wasn't the one writing them!), but I said I was going to do it, so doggonit, I'm going to persevere 'til the end.  

Now on to the list:

6)  Finally getting to see Ben Folds perform.  I have wanted to see him for years because he's pretty much the coolest nerd ever, and he plays piano which really ups his cool points in my book.

5)  Asserting myself.  I won't go into specifics, but it's a pretty good feeling.  Hopefully, it'll get easier as I do it more.

4)  Going to Texas.  I got to see two of my best friends in their new lives, and I got to get my picture taken sitting on a genuine Texas longhorn.  Can it get any better than that?

3)  Purchasing my car.  I researched, test drove, and negotiated with crooked salesmen pretty much all by myself for an entire month.  Yeah, I probably got taken a little bit, but I now know I can do it on my own, and I feel like this was an initiating ritual into adulthood.

2)  Attending the funeral of my student Carlos.  I know it seems pretty morbid to consider this a good experience, but it was a very celebratory, cultural service unlike any other I have attended.  There was no doubt in anyone's mind that this child, whose contorted body had been confined to a wheelchair, was free from his body and in Heaven.  Everyone rejoiced in that while still allowing themselves to mourn.  It was a huge funeral, and I could not believe the number of lives he touched.  Words can't express how beautiful the whole experience was. 

1)  Going back for Year Two after the pretty crummy year I had.  I went through a lot last school year but learned so much.  All summer I tried to get out of going back, but something kept pushing me to return.  Had I not gone back, I would have totally wasted that experience, and although this year isn't ideal, I'm not nearly as green and can handle what's given to me with a little more professionalism, dignity, and together-ness.

My Top 7 Purchases of 2007

It looks as if I was hit pretty hard by the consumerism bug this year, as I made several large purchases.  I was really blessed this year with a bit of unexpected money (and good credit), and I can promise that it will not have another year like this one for a long time.

(We'll get the big ones out of the way first)

7)  My car-Yes, it does make me sweat a little when I think of how much I still owe on it, but it is so wonderful to be able to plan for car payments rather than having unexpected expenses every time your car needs to go into the shop (which for The Beast was becoming a monthly occurrence)

6)  My MacBook-After being chained to a desktop for years, I broke down and got a laptop.  I loved being able to walk into the Apple Store, pick out what I wanted, and walk out in about ten minutes, kind of like going to the grocery store. It was a pretty painless experience, especially with a student AND educator discount.  I'm beginning to believe the ancient adage "Once you go Mac, you never go back."

5)  My Ipod-It's glorious to be able to be able to listen to any CD I own at the touch of a button (and watch videos and store my pictures).  It's amazing!

4)  My CHI-I have fought with kinky, unruly hair for my entire life, and it was made worse this year by trying to grow out a perm.  This little straightener changed my life (and is backed by a lifetime guarantee!)

3)  CHI Infra Treatment Thermal Protective Treatment-(I had to look up it's technical name)-my haircutter talked me into buying this in January, and I haven't even used half of the small bottle.  This stuff makes your hair really soft, keeps it from getting frizzy, and protects it from the heat of your straightener.

(writing about hair products makes me feel really vain)

2)  "Real Sex" and "Mudhouse Sabbath"-both books by Lauren Winner.  Lauren is my idol!  If you get a chance, search for her name in Itunes.  She has some really good podcasts from when she spoke at Gordon College.  Or just read her books.  I suggest beginning with "Girl Meets God"  (it didn't make my list since I didn't purchase it)

1)  My cookie dough scooper-This is my $3 miracle.  If you've been around me the last couple of months, you have probably been forced to listen to me rave about this.  The scooping part of the spoon is made of rubber (or silicone-I can't tell) so you only have to use one hand when scooping dough.  You can just push it right out of there.  I originally purchased it to keep at school, but I love it so much that I keep it in my purse.  You never know when you're going to bake cookies! (I'm a nerd)

  

(Obviously I hadn't CHIed when this picture was taken)

Merry Christmas, my friends!

My 8 Guilty Pleasures of 2007

8)  Seasonal Drinks-I've got the drink calendar down and know exactly what place to hit when for Shamrock Shakes, Java Chip Frappucinos, Pumpkin Spice Lattes, Peppermint Mochas

7)  Monthly massages-Well, this didn't last long since my massage therapist broke up with me. It was one of those "it's not me, it's you" break-ups, as she said, "I'm just too old and tired to massage someone with so much tension.  I think a set of younger hands would be better for you."  

6)  Cinnamon Melts from McDonald's-I get one of these almost every Friday morning as a reward to myself for making it through the week, or at least that's how I justify eating something that is so wonderful but so bad for you on a regular basis.

5)  McDonald's Coffee-When I don't want to shell out the cash for a Starbucks, this is the next best thing.

4)  Squeezing out just a little too much glue when doing art projects with my kids, just so I can peel it off of my fingers

3)  America's Next Top Model-if it's a marathon weekend, I can forget getting anything done

2)  "Selective Feminism"-This is a phrase I stole from one of my favorite authors, Lauren Winner and am definitely guilty.  I am an independent woman, and I definitely don't need a man to do anything for me (unless he wants to scrape the ice off of my car, or hold a door open for me, or carry something heavy, or sweep me off of my feet, etc)

1)  Feeding my student with autism Fruit Loops so I can watch him separate them and eat them by color (blues first, then yellow, then red...)

  

Top 9 Realizations of 2007

9)  I probably will never marry John Mayer (although I'm still holding out hope).

8)   When it comes to school, the kids don't care if your shoes are cute.  Go for comfort, even if it means wearing the same shoes everyday.  

7)  When giving a child directions, don't present them in question form (ex.  Will you please put up those chairs?) because the answer will be no every single time.

6)  Be generous with your grace. You have been given much and require much. (The "you" I'm referencing should really be "I.")

5)  Buying things on credit usually isn't a good idea (Thanks Dave!).

4) A good bra can change your life. Seriously.

3)  People older than yourself have a lot of wisdom.  Learn from it. (and it is ok to have friends who are significantly older than you, regardless of what others think) 

2)  Learn from your mistakes-i.e. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results-i.e. Be careful while using the stove or you'll catch your kitchen on fire-twice, the same way, in six months.

1)  A cup of coffee really can make most things better (and unlike alcohol, you can drink it at work).

(Now if I can only apply these everyday...)

Your turn....

The 10 Days of 2007

Since I am now on Christmas break and can't get my blogspiration from my students, I have to get it from other places.  Everyone and their brother are making their Top 10 of 2007 lists, and I felt inspired to make some of my own.  Starting today, there are ten days left in 2007, and I plan on making a list everyday for the remainder of the year. 

My Top 10 CDs of 2007

10) "Dan in Real Life" Soundtrack-most of the music is by a French guy named Sondre Lerche-fun and light hearted stuff.  The movie was good as well.

9) "Instant Karma:  The Amnesty International Campaign to Save Darfur"-a compilation of John Lennon songs remade by artists like Jack Johnson, Ben Harper, Regina Spektor, The Postal Service, etc.

8)  The White Strips-"Icky Thump"-makes me feel like an old school rocker

7)  The Shins-"Wincing the Night Away"-Happy music, although I sometimes feel like I'm  taking drugs when I listen to it.  I no longer listen to it while I'm driving, since it's the CD that was playing when I hit the deer.  I guess I'm a little superstitious.

6)  Tristan Prettyman-"Twentythree"-love the sassy song "Shy That Way," and I play "Love, Love, Love" as I pull out of the driveway in the morning.  It makes me feel like I can go out and face the world.

5)  Caedmon's Call-"Overdressed"-I actually got this as a gift (Thanks Danielle!).  They brought Derek Webb back.  Do I need any other reason to put this on my list?

4)  Andrew Peterson-"Behold the Lamb of God"-technically a Christmas CD, but I think I can listen to it all year long.  Derek Webb and his wife Sandra McCracken contribute along with Jill Phillips.  This was released in 2003, but I just purchased it.

3)  Ingrid Michaelson-"Girls and Boys"- a fun CD I think I could have written if I was artistic.  I love "Overboard" and of course the Old Navy sweater song-"The Way I Am."

2) " Grey's Anatomy Soundtrack, Volume 3"-I originally bought this CD because of the Ingrid Michaelson song, but there isn't a song on the album I don't like.  One of my favorites is "Again & Again" by The Bird and the Bee (they were a Free Download of the Week two weeks ag0)

1)  Sara Groves-"Tell Me What You Know"-Her music is so great because it's honest, vulnerable, and makes me think about something new every time I listen to it.  All of her albums are great, but this one really struck chord inside of me.

What are yours?

Be Careful What You Wish For

Today, we had state government VIP come to our school to get a more clear picture of what we are about, as there is often talk in the legislature to stop our funding (we're funded by the state). His first stop was a visit our happy little classroom, since I'm the one who invited him. Once again, I didn't prep my kids the way I should have (although their behavior is so volatile, I'm not quite sure how effective prepping would actually be), and once again they put on a good show.

When I introduced our guest of honor, my girl with Down's spit at him and said, "Buh bye," my autistic mess picked his nose, and my talker unbuttoned her pants so she could have a better angle in which to scratch her stomach and then laid on the floor because, "I tired."  I attempted every bribe and trick I could think of-"I'll fix you popcorn.  Do you want a piece of gum?  Let's have a snack!  Santa Claus is coming to town!  He's making a list of who's naughty and nice.  You better get up!"  Nothing worked.

I think Mr. GOH was amused by this, but my principal was mortified.  She said to him, "You know the whole name of our school, right?"  She then whispered, "(insert school's name) for the Severely Handicapped" as she quickly escorted him out.

I always said that I wanted to live a life that gives me stories when I grow old.  I guess I should be care what I wish for (or at least be more specific).

(Actually, I wouldn't trade these stories for anything)

Bears and Bondage

One of my students suffers from multiple and sometimes severe seizures, and because of this, for her safety, she spends a lot of her day strapped in a special chair (I am so thankful for that chair). Unfortunately, I have yet to successfully explain to my other kids that getting strapped in is not a privilege, and they have become fixated on trying to strap themselves into chairs. I understand how their minds are working, but it is still an odd behavior I'd like to see end.

We have an old stuffed bear/dog (I can't tell what it is) in my room that my talker has taken a liking to.  She loves it, and often when she is throwing one of her awful tantrums you can say the stuffed creature's name, and it will end.  It's name is Poo Poo Bear.

I came back from my lunch Monday and found this somewhat disturbing, but hilarious scene:

Poo Poo Bear doesn't stand a chance.

(By the way, my talker named Poo Poo Bear, not me.  When I asked if she meant Pooh Bear she was very adamant in correcting me)

Throwing the Baby Out With the Bath Water

Let me preface by saying that this is a ranting post. 

After spending three and a half hours working on MAP-A APIs (don't worry, I get paid to understand the acronyms and still don't), I am cranky, and that's where this post comes from. It's probably one that shouldn't be posted, but my good sense goes out the window when the sun goes down (which unfortunately for you, gentle readers, was 4:56 tonight-haha).

I got into my job because I love working with kids with special needs but had no idea of all of the bureaucratic hoops I would have to jump through to do so.  So often I feel that instead of focusing on the kids, my days are spent working on activities "for the kids."  The last week  I have spent my time working on standardized testing (and will spend the next three months doing this).  The week before that, I worked on progress reports.  The week before that, I was working on an IEP. The week before that I attended a two day inservice.  The list goes and on. Instead of teaching the kids, I feel like I entertain them so I can get my paperwork done.

As an RA, I often felt the way I do now.  We would spend hours planning hall, dorm, and campus activities that residents did not want to attend.  Shouldn't I have spent that time with the girls on my hall (the whole reason I took the job) instead of spending hours and hours in meetings that made me unavailable to those I was supposed to serve?

My question is, why do things have to be so complicated?  I know that there needs to be standards, procedures, and policies in order for things to run smoothly, but why is it that so often these "good" things totally miss what they are trying to improve?  Why do I have to spend three months testing kids?  So the school continues to receive funding.  Why should the school continue to receive funding?  So they can spend 1/4 of the year next year testing students.  To me, this just doesn't make any sense.

Anyway, I apologize for my crankiness, and I promise my next post will be happy-but that might not be for another three months when this testing is finished (just kidding).

I'm Gonna Be One Less

Last week I went to a doctor's appointment, and since I'm under the cut off age of twenty-six  I was given some information about getting the Gardasil vaccine (and all of the awful things that could happen if you don't get it).  Before I left the office, I had to get some blood work done, and when I finally left I was distracted and didn't even think about what I was holding. I got on the elevator on the fifth floor and had to stop on the fourth to let on a very attractive, seemingly single guy my age with me.  I smiled and made eye contact (just like the dating experts say to do), and I did not even get a smile in return.  Instead, my advances were returned with a look of absolute disgust.  I silently went over all reasons that could have merited that response (I even considered size stickers and smelling like manure), and then I looked down to see the paper I was parading around for all to see.

Needless to say, my pool of potentials has one less.

The Story of the Big Girl Bathroom

I'm not quite sure how it started, but last year my girl with Down's decided that she would no longer use the restroom in our classroom.  Maybe because it's because she knew one student hit the seat more than he hit the water or maybe because of the funky smell that never quite goes away, but for whatever reason she decided that she was only going to use the restroom at the other side of the school.  While in the classroom, I would ask her if she needed to use the bathroom, and she would always say no.  The minute we would leave the room for any reason, and sometimes this would be hours into the school day, she would frantically sign restroom and point into the direction of what has now been dubbed "The Big Girl Bathroom."  A staff member would accompany her to prevent any mischief and make sure she always washed her hands.

When my school is fully staffed, there is one teacher and two teacher's aides in every classroom.  This year the whole school is understaffed (does anyone need a job?), and my classroom only has one aide.  Over the summer, this student did not forget her love of the Big Girl Bathroom, and when she came back from break, she still refused to go in the classroom. Being short handed, one of us could not take her every time she needed, and because she did so well last year, I decided to allow her to go independently.  

The first day we tried out this independence, the poor girl never made it to the bathroom.  She left four times and each time a staff member would bring her back to my class (before she made it) because they thought she was wandering the hall without permission.  My aide made this sign, and the girl wore it proudly.

After awhile, the sign got torn up, and we decided that a hall pass would be a little more appropriate (there's that word again). She is still using it, and everyone in the school knows where she's supposed to be going and keeps an eye out for her.  So, when she signs restroom right in my face, I know to say, "Get your hall pass and go."

This probably doesn't seem like a big deal to most people, but in her world, this is huge. This particular student has always been placed with students who were higher functioning than herself, and I think this made her lose confidence in her abilities.  Last fall she was placed in Room 5 and became top dog.  It's so great to see her confidently walk down the hall showing her hall pass to her former classmates like it's a trophy, as if to say, "See, I CAN do something well."  

I know that she doesn't always have to go to the bathroom every time she asks. She also uses the restroom as a way to take a break from the frequent insanity of our room, when she's trying to avoid something, or when she wants to show something off to the whole school, like the Royal's baseball cap she swiped from the kid with autism or her new shoes with the pink hearts on them.  And to me, that's ok.  I can tolerate a little lollygagging for a "Big Girl" any day.

(I feel like I provide a lot of background information in my stories.  Please tell me if it's too much and I'm just rambling)

Let It Snow

My students were enthralled by the snow yesterday, particularly my girl with Down's.  I went outside with her three times, and when she asked to go out the fourth, I wouldn't let her (I'm so mean).  She then asked if she could use the"big girl" restroom (which is a story in itself), and when she didn't come back after about ten minutes, I peeked my head out the door, and this is what I found.  She was mesmerized.

Hit Me With Your Best Shot (because it'll probably work)

Once a week, each classroom is given a "homeliving" time. This is a block of two or three hours that the teacher can choose different daily living skills to work on, whether it be working on laundry, making beds, washing dishes, cooking, etc. Ideally, we do activities that are simple enough that the kids can actively participate in and benefit from. 

I cook with my kids every week and try to find simple and fun recipes for them to make.  Sometimes- ok- a lot of times-I resort to baking cookies.  It's one thing I know I can do well, and for a girl who caught her kitchen on fire twice in the last year, that's important.  Today was no different.  We made the wonderful oatmeal raisin cookie recipe on the Quaker Oats canister (I highly recommend it!).

A pretty common characteristic of kids with disabilities is their love of eating (and inability to stop after a reasonable portion).  Add this to typical teenage eating, and six dozen cookies can quickly disappear if I'm not on my game.  Because I do not want parents calling me after their child threw up all night, I try to limit their intake.  When the student really, really wants what I'm keeping from him or her, all tricks gets pulled out of the bag-every sign they know and every nice word they've ever heard (because they know I'm a sucker).

Today's conversation with my Talker:

Talker (whispering and signing "more"):  "More cookie please."

Me: "What are you saying?"

Talker (this time louder, signing "more," "please," and "cookie"):  "More cookie please."

Me:  "No, you're finished.  You've already had three."

Talker (while trying to hug and kiss me): "More cookie please."

 

Me:  "No, we are all finished, and kisses aren't appropriate."

Talker:  "More cookie please, amen"

Me:  "Are you praying for a cookie?"

Talker:  "Yeah.  More cookie please, amen."

Me (as I hand her another cookie):  "This is it."

And that is why I'll have the fattest (but maybe the happiest!) class in school.

How I wasted my Saturday:

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1128508098