The Long Defeat (or a lyrics post no one likes to read)

Tonight I got to see some of my very favorite artists performing all together in Andrew Peterson's "Behold the Lamb of God" tour.  Sara Groves performed a couple of songs off of her new album, and the second one she sang encouraged me so much.  While discussing her work with the International Justice Mission, she talked about how there are millions trapped in the sex trade and how the problem always had and always will exist.  No matter how hard she works, she will always be defeated but knows that by not joining in the fight to help, she'd be fighting against the cause and she rests in the assurance that albeit small, she is making a difference.  As a result of these thoughts, she wrote "The Long Defeat." 

With the kids I work with, progress is so slow and small that you often don't see any results of their (and your) hard work unless someone points it out to you .  I knew this when I started this line of work, but I guess I never thought about how taxing it can actually be, especially when a student regresses for no apparent reason.  Lately, I've been really struggling with the realization that I am not and will never be a miracle worker for these kids and that I can't change the world.  It makes me want to throw my hands up and quit caring.

This song makes me feel a little better about my job:

 

"The Long Defeat" I have joined the long defeat  that falling set in motion  all my strength and energy  are raindrops in the ocean  so conditioned for the win  to share in victor's stories  but in the place of ambition's din  I've heard of other glories  I pray for an idea  and a way I cannot see  It's too heavy to carry  and impossible to leave  I can't just fight when I think I'll win  that's the end of all belief  and nothing has provoked it more  than a possible defeat  I pray for an idea  and a way I cannot see  It's too heavy to carry  and impossible to leave  We walk a while we sit and rest  we lay it on the altar  I won't pretend to know what's next  but what I have I've offered  I pray for a vision  and a way I cannot see  It's too heavy to carry  and impossible to leave  I pray for inspiration  and a way I cannot see  It's too heavy to carry  and impossible to leave

I have an unpleasant history with Schwan's men.

Our last Schwan's man was extremely pushy. He would walk into our house without ringing the doorbell and try to sneakily get us to purchase extra food. It got to the point where I would position myself in front of the door when I heard his truck rumble down the street and wait for an almost-argument to ensue. When I found out this Schwan's man quit, I was overjoyed and knew the new one could only be better (and he has been thus-far).

Well, tonight I inadvertently took this new relationship to the next level. I heard his truck pull up, and he rang the doorbell. I go to answer the door, and because I am a klutz, I get my button up shirt caught up on the door, resulting in multiple buttons coming undone. Hoping he would be a gentleman and ignore my faux pas (and that I didn't show him all of my business), I spun around, put myself back together, and then turned back around to take care of the transaction at hand.

Oh, but my luck could not be that fortunate. He had a smirk on his face as he said, "Wow, that takes some talent-opening the door AND taking your shirt off at the same time." I didn't have the gall to tell him we needed frozen chicken breasts, so I just said we didn't need anything this week.

I should be mortified, but things like this happen to me quite often.

On a totally unrelated note, the following is why school should not be in session the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. Only one student will show up, he will fall asleep, and then the teacher and her sub will do ridiculous things like this:

Realizations With Darcie

1) A visit from your superintendent is kind of a big deal, especially when he is over at least fifty schools spanning across the state of  Missouri and only visits each of them once a year.

2) Not cleaning your classroom for your superintendent's visit as a way of "sticking it to the man" sticks no one but yourself.  In 2 minutes, he won't come to the conclusion that you didn't clean because you spend all of your time with your students.  He'll just see a messy classroom. Oops.

3)  Prepare your kids a little bit for a visit from the superintendent.  Otherwise they'll say phrases to him like, "Are you my daddy?" and "Why you be comin' in here scarin' me again?"

4)  If your student doesn't come back from the restroom in a timely manner it doesn't always mean she's lolly-gagging around the hall.  She might sitting on the toilet watching your friend Danielle trying to coax a laughing girl twice her size up from the floor (after she threw herself down)

(and this one's not related to school)

4)  When going in for your annual thyroid checkup and they ask you about fasting, don't assume they mean for medical purposes.  If you do, it might end up in a conversation like this:

Phlebotomist:  "I'm having a hard time finding your vein. Have you been fasting?"

Darcie:  "Nope.  He's never had me fast before my blood work."

Phlebotomist (with a straight face):  "Oh, I was thinking you may be fasting for Ramadan."

Thanks for visiting my new place!